Fizzle

[A telephone conversation between myself and a homeowner.]

Homeowner: “I want to paint my house a different color. What do I need to do?”

Me: “All you need to do is fill out and submit an ACC Request form, which can be downloaded from our website, or…”

Homeowner: “I NEVER HEAR FROM YOU PEOPLE.”

Me: “Pardon?”

Homeowner: “I PAY YOU A LOT OF MONEY, AND YOU NEVER EMAIL ME ANYTHING.”

[Ed. Note: The maintenance fees paid by homeowners go directly into the HOA’s accounts, not to the management company. People don’t realize this, though, so when calling to complain, the first thing they do is remind us that they PAY A LOT OF MONEY.]

Me: “Actually, I send out monthly email updates to your entire community. Perhaps my emails have been getting caught in your SPAM filters?”

Homeowner: “NO. YOU NEVER EMAIL ME.”

Me: “Okay, then let me look in my records to make sure we have the correct address for you.”

Homeowner: “YOU NEVER EMAIL ME.”

Me: “Is your email address [I read off the address we have on file]?”

Homeowner: “No. That’s an old address.”

Me: “What’s your current email address?”

[She gives me her new address, and I update our records.]

Me: “Great, so now that I have your email, I will send you the ACC Request form, and you can just fill it out and send it back to me.”

Homeowner: “I CALLED THIS MORNING, AND YOU NEVER CALLED ME BACK.”

Me: “Ma’am, I was out of the office this morning on property visits, but I am in the process of getting caught up on messages… which is why we’re talking now.”

Homeowner: “Oh.” [Beat.] “Thanks.”

[Click.]

But hey, at least she said thanks. That’s a first right there.

One thought on “Fizzle

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s