In which I had to promise not to execute any more heretics

[A tangential conversation between myself and my sponsor that occurred in the middle of us doing some step work.]

Simon: “I’ve been to three yoga classes in the past two days.”

Me: “Just out of curiosity, have you ever looked into yoga teaching certification?”

Simon: “I have, and I’ve figured out how much money I would need in the bank in order to quit my job and pursue it.”

Me: “You’ve really thought this through, huh?”

Simon: “Yup. My dream is to wake up every day and just do yoga and go fishing.”

Me: “Hmmm. Maybe I should quit my job and follow my own dreams.”

Simon: “What, like starting your own Pagan religion?”

Me: “Oh. That’s actually already on my ‘Harms Done’ list.”

Simon: “…”

And then I told him about the Proto-Lithuanian Unicorn Cult, and he stopped blinking for like five minutes. Considering that he knows more about me than my parents, roommate and ex-boyfriend combined, it’s pretty impressive that I’m still able to render him speechless.

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